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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25723549">Please Stay Real</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsobviousbynow/pseuds/itsobviousbynow'>itsobviousbynow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wynonna Earp (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>18 months alone?, 4x02 continuation, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Nicole and Waverly actually talk, They've both been through a lot, bruh i've hardly managed quarantine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:21:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,110</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25723549</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsobviousbynow/pseuds/itsobviousbynow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Spending 18 months alone and with only the hope that her family would return must have taken a toll on Nicole.<br/>But at first Waverly doesn’t see it, at least not until it became something she couldn’t ignore.</p><p>OR</p><p>There’s no way Nicole made it through all of that time alone without picking up some extra trauma. Waverly just can’t believe she didn’t realize it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Waverly Earp &amp; Nicole Haught, Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>265</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Please Stay Real</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I’m kind of just ignoring whatever is going on with what Wynonna and Doc found in Purgatory. I’m sure it’s important, we just don't know much yet and it’s not what this one is about.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Waverly doesn't think she can be faulted for not noticing at first. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They were back in the bubble, everything was perfect. Even though it had only been a few days for Waverly, there was such genuine passion and desire behind Nicole’s actions that Waverly felt almost as if she understood her longing. They fell back into place together as if no time had passed at all and Waverly was totally content with where they were, with how happy they were to have each other again. Why would she think anything was wrong when there was nothing she would have wanted to change?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She and Nicole had been attached at the hip the first couple days. Once Wynonna and Doc had finally been accounted for, Waverly and Nicole had hardly left their room. The room that Nicole had kept immaculate for Waverly all this time, just as she had left it with not a single thing out of place and hardly any evidence that Nicole had been living there for the past year and a half.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They were desperate to be together again, to feel one another, as if that wasn’t evidenced by the desperation that had flooded their reunion. Nicole wanted nothing more than to stay near Waverly, close to her, connected. All of this mixed with Waverly’s basking in the fact that they were officially engaged, that she was going to be married to Nicole, and that they would always be together, everything felt right. Nicole had cried, a couple more times during their reunion, but she always managed to do it with a smile on her face, reassuring Waverly that she was just so happy to see her, to feel her, to be able to hear her again. Anytime she looked as if she were tearing up, she would grab Waverly’s hand and press a kiss to the back of it, a slow lingering moment as if she thought Waverly’s hand might disappear in her own. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But then it doesn’t stop.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It doesn’t lessen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole never seems actually able to relax.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her eyes are always on Waverly, her hand always touching her in some way. She didn’t like it when Waverly wasn’t in the room right beside her. Not that Nicole would ever voice that, nor did she make a habit of following Waverly when she would leave the room after the first couple of odd looks when she did so. But the quiet lilt to her breathing as Waverly would stand to leave, the look of eagerness on her face whenever Waverly did come back, it didn’t go unnoticed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She almost thought it was sweet at first, how much Nicole wanted to be with her now that they were all back together. But when it didn’t stop, she realized that the change in Nicole’s breathing when she would stand wasn’t necessarily because she missed the contact she had with Waverly, but because she was anxious that Waverly wouldn’t come back. The eagerness on Nicole’s face when she did in fact walk right back into the room was relief over fear that she wouldn’t.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they would sit at the end of the night, cuddled on the couch in their pajamas down in front of the fire, and listening to Wynonna ramble on about something or drinking sleepy-time tea before bed, Waverly always felt Nicole’s eyes on her. There would be one arm slung over Waverly’s shoulders, with Nicole pulling her fiance closer into her body and pressing soft kisses to the crown of her head seemingly every time she was struck with the desire. Her gaze was gentle, always unintrusive and radiating pure love, but she almost never looked away. It was as if she were afraid that looking away from Waverly would have her disappear into thin air. Whenever Waverly would look over and catch her gaze, she was always met with a sweet smile reserved just for the two of them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But something wasn’t right. This wasn’t who they were. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sure, Nicole was nothing if not a devoted partner, always loving, always reassuring, always by her side. There was just something to this Nicole that wasn’t right, that never could breathe easily, that didn’t dare accept the world around her as her own. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she finally did realize, Waverly tried to ignore it. She didn’t want to have to leave perfection… not again. Not when Nicole was right there, when she was real and solid, and wanted nothing more than to have Waverly in her arms.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It just wasn’t right. No matter how much Waverly wanted to keep living inside this bubble, no matter how much she wanted to hold on to the bliss that was their relationship, it wasn’t real.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not if Nicole couldn’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finally one night Waverly had to ask, she couldn’t keep ignoring it, keep hoping that Nicole would bring it up when she was ready. It seemed to her that Nicole was never going to be ready, almost that she was refusing to acknowledge that anything could be wrong.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>How real could it be, though, when they weren’t being open with one another?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So Waverly, with her head pressed to Nicole’s chest, listening to the steady and reassuring sound of her heartbeat asked in a timid voice, “Nicole, what’s going on?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean, baby?” she asked, reaching out for Waverly’s hand and squeezing it solidly, as if to ensure that her fingers didn’t fall right through.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just,” she paused, “I feel like there’s something wrong.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole stiffened, “Is it the Garden? Is it trying to-?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, Baby, no,” Waverly said softly, running her hand soothingly down Nicole’s arm. “Nothing like that, nothing to do with the crazy part of our life, ok?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smiled reassuringly at Nicole until she got a gentle nod and felt Nicole start to relax beneath her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Unitl she said, “It’s us.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s brows knit together, “Us? I thought that we… I- I mean I still feel…” her voice picked up a panicked edge and she began racing through her words, “I thought that you did too. I thought that we were- I know that it had been a long time for me but-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Whoa, whoa, hey,” Waverly took Nicole’s face in her hands, “Hold your horses, Haught Stuff. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We’re</span>
  </em>
  <span> okay, alright? I love you, I’m</span>
  <em>
    <span> in</span>
  </em>
  <span> love with you,” she said, running her thumb over Nicole’s cheekbone. “That isn’t going to change, I promise you. I just didn’t word that right, Baby, I’m sorry. There’s nothing wrong with us.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole nodded gently between her hands, but said nothing as Waverly dropped them back down to their laps.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Besides,” Waverly leaned in, brushing her nose suggestively against Nicole’s cheek, wanting desperately to reassure her, “If things weren’t absolutely great between us, we wouldn’t be having all of that mind-blowing, earth-shattering, amazingly-hot sex that you’re so sure Wynonna can hear.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Again it brought that same twinge of concern forward in Waverly’s mind. Nicole wouldn’t normally react like that, in fact her Nicole wouldn’t have reacted with anything but a witty response and a tight pull of Waverly’s body against her own, making Waverly breathless as she flipped them over and pressed her into the couch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was more to it, so much more Nicole needed, and Waverly didn’t know how to give it to her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It just…” she began, “You seem like you’re still scared of something, Baby. Not that there’s anything wrong with being scared, we’ve had to deal with our fair share of shit-eaters, so I get it,” Waverly tried to smile as she pressed her hand to Nicole’s chest, running it along her collarbone, “But I can’t help if you won’t tell me what’s wrong.” She reached down, taking Nicole’s hand and holding it to her own chest, “You can tell me anything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well I- I mean…” Nicole breathed in slowly, a slight shuddering in her chest, “You’re here, Waverly,” she began slowly, “You’re here… you’re here and you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>real</span>
  </em>
  <span>... after so long you-” her voice cracked and Nicole struggled to swallow over a lump that had formed in her throat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Waverly understood, give her the chance and she always did, “After so long I wasn’t,” she finished softly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole nodded, “You were gone for so long, Waverly. After awhile, walking around here, being in the homestead… I kept thinking that I saw you, or that I heard you moving around downstairs, or that I felt you on the other side of the bed, but you were never there.” Nicole took another breath, tightening her jaw to the emotion and blinking against it, “Then it felt like I was starting to forget. I didn’t think I would ever be able to forget anything about you, but time passed and things started slipping. I didn’t remember </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly </span>
  </em>
  <span>how your laugh sounded. I didn't remember how </span>
  <em>
    <span>soft </span>
  </em>
  <span>you are, everywhere. I would try to remember what you felt like, how you felt in my arms or what it was like when you touched me, but it wasn’t right. It wasn’t real.” Tears welled in Nicole’s eyes, “You weren’t real. I am so happy to have you back, Waverly Earp, I love you more than I thought possible. But I am so afraid that this isn’t real… that this is all going to go away, that I’ll lose you and then I’ll have to forget </span>
  <em>
    <span>again. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I can’t do that baby.” Nicole shuddered, “I can’t let you slip away again.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Baby, I’m not going anywhere.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You weren’t going anywhere last time either.” Tears finally fell down Nicole’s cheeks. She ducked her head down, her chin falling to her chest and her long hair falling to either side of her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Waverly felt her heart breaking for the girl in front of her. She hadn’t realized how much of a toll all that time alone had taken on Nicole, but she hadn’t asked. Gently tucking the red hair behind her ear, Waverly rested her hand on Nicole’s neck, her thumb tracing her jawline, “I can’t imagine what it was like for you… here waiting for all of us.” She paused, but when Nicole said nothing, her brows knit together and she tried to get Nicole to meet her eyes before she continued. “Your family was gone for eighteen months, 3 weeks, and 4 days, and no matter how much you believe in the Earp’s, all that time you had to wonder if we would ever…” Waverly squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, “But we’re back now, I’m back, and I’m never going to leave you like that again.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Baby, you don’t know that,” Nicole said, in a voice so broken Waverly hadn’t heard anything like it since Nicole was remembering the Cult of Bulshar.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Waverly took a deep breath, exhaling slowly, “Nicole, you’re right, I don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>it, I can’t. Our lives have already been so much more bananas than I ever thought they would be. But I </span>
  <em>
    <span>believe </span>
  </em>
  <span>it. We can do this, Baby, we’ve made it through everything, and we can get through anything. We can’t spend the rest of our lives afraid of what might happen, Nicole. I am here. I am real. I am yours. And I’m not going anywhere.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Waverly leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to Nicole’s lips and pouring in every ounce of reassurance that she could.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was only seconds before Nicole kissed back, melting into Waverly’s touch and sighing contentedly against her lips. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Waverly was first to pull back, pressing her forehead against Nicole’s, “We have to believe that the craziest has already happened. We broke a curse, we killed an ancient demon, you got beat up a lot more than I would have liked,” Waverly grinned as Nicole scoffed at that, a gentle smile finally coming back over her face “We got through that, we made it to the other end together, no matter how long it took me to get back to you. We have to believe that we will always find each other.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She leaned in again, offering a solid kiss before leaning back and meeting Nicole’s gaze.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I need you to believe it with me,” Waverly said softly, holding her hand out for Nicole.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nicole looked down, seeing Waverly’s palm up, open, and waiting for her. She took a deep, steadying breath before finally looking back up and meeting Waverly’s gaze, a look simply pleading that Nicole take her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And so she did, pulling the back of it up to her lips and pressing a kiss there, trying to say everything she could in so innocent an action, “I do.”</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading! I fear I overuse my commas, but you know what? That shit is more real life. Who doesn't talk in run-on sentences?</p><p>I really hope you enjoyed it! Feel free to visit me on tumblr @itsobviousbynow</p></blockquote></div></div>
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